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09-15-2015, 03:24 PM
Believe it or not, ordering the lamb chops, or not, can tell a lot about you. The real you. The you that feels deserving or entitled or indulgent.
Do you order what you want? Or what you should want? Do you deprive yourself of what you want to save: $$$, face, calories? When you order the metaphorical chops on the menu do you feel satisfied, or guilty, or something else entirely?
Does frugality barbwire fence your wants? Do you not deserve the little lamb?
I have several male friends (and most likely more, I am guessing, if I expanded my research lab to more folks), that will not order the lamb chops due to fear. Fear that they will launch themselves into a go crazy zone. If they ordered what they want, they fear they will lose control. So they pick the chicken. They like the chicken. It's safe. It's fine. They are fine with the plate they didn't really desire. I am beginning to believe, when we restrain ourselves for phobic fearful reasons, we can really mess ourselves up. I think we must order what we want from the menu, from life, with in reason, or we may go crazy, anyway. Will we not we pine for the plate that got away?
This withholding does seem insane to me and so I am dwelling on the shackles of it all. If I "shouldn't" be ordering the lamb chops and I love lamb chops and I am watching, forlornly, plate after plate pass my table, I know I will go a little wacky with want. I will feel deprived. I would rather not go to the lamb chop shop, if I cannot have them. I would rather go out half as often to save: the $, the calories, the judgment, or whatever is my fearful justification for deprivation. I would rather save up for the meal that makes me happy, rather than eat the proverbial chicken dish that I only sort of want. Isn't it such a delight to: have someone else collect the ingredients and groceries, add cool spices and flavor, and serve us what we want, on a platter? Not, what we sort of want.
Why am I so heaven bent on selling "them" on asking for what they want? Why am I so incensed that They tend to not order what they truly want? Maybe, since I am in the business of facilitating getting what "they," my life coaching clients, want all day long? I am used to working with people that do want to order what they want from the menu of life. I must try to surrender the desire to convince these lamb chop folks to order what they want. If choosing to not order what they really want helps them feel empowered, so be it. Right?
This may just be a matter of attitude and habits with money (same for calories). We all have them.
I enrolled in a weekend long class to figure out a little bit about my money hapitudes (habits and attitudes). Check out the website below if you are interested in more information. It could use a facelift, though the content is exceptional. The site and workshops are supportive in sorting out our relationship with $ and how that union affects our choices, and our wants.
http://www.moneyhabitudes.com
I learned so much. What type of $ person I am. I was nervous. I didn't know much about money or my relationship with it. Funny, the couples in the class were ying to yang with one another. I was my own ying/yang juxtaposition, since I chose to go it alone. The half of the twosomes that spent more than the budget had space for (usually secretly), felt guilty and entitled. They ordered the delicious Chops, always. The other half in each coupling was the direct opposite. They were usually the frugal rule makers, feeling safe when each penny is accounted for. They ordered the safe chicken. Each party admitted to singing up for the course after years of making themselves and their other half crazy with the habits and attitudes that collided within their union.
I came away less stressed and more grounded with the way I am about deserving and spending. I decided at the end of the course, that I wish for and plan for enjoying a Magical Amazing Love Affair with My Money. I want passion and purpose to drive my spending choices. That means, I will order what I want when it is aligned with my habitudes and budget. -- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. (http://start.westnet.ca/newstempch.php?article=terms.html/) It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
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Do you order what you want? Or what you should want? Do you deprive yourself of what you want to save: $$$, face, calories? When you order the metaphorical chops on the menu do you feel satisfied, or guilty, or something else entirely?
Does frugality barbwire fence your wants? Do you not deserve the little lamb?
I have several male friends (and most likely more, I am guessing, if I expanded my research lab to more folks), that will not order the lamb chops due to fear. Fear that they will launch themselves into a go crazy zone. If they ordered what they want, they fear they will lose control. So they pick the chicken. They like the chicken. It's safe. It's fine. They are fine with the plate they didn't really desire. I am beginning to believe, when we restrain ourselves for phobic fearful reasons, we can really mess ourselves up. I think we must order what we want from the menu, from life, with in reason, or we may go crazy, anyway. Will we not we pine for the plate that got away?
This withholding does seem insane to me and so I am dwelling on the shackles of it all. If I "shouldn't" be ordering the lamb chops and I love lamb chops and I am watching, forlornly, plate after plate pass my table, I know I will go a little wacky with want. I will feel deprived. I would rather not go to the lamb chop shop, if I cannot have them. I would rather go out half as often to save: the $, the calories, the judgment, or whatever is my fearful justification for deprivation. I would rather save up for the meal that makes me happy, rather than eat the proverbial chicken dish that I only sort of want. Isn't it such a delight to: have someone else collect the ingredients and groceries, add cool spices and flavor, and serve us what we want, on a platter? Not, what we sort of want.
Why am I so heaven bent on selling "them" on asking for what they want? Why am I so incensed that They tend to not order what they truly want? Maybe, since I am in the business of facilitating getting what "they," my life coaching clients, want all day long? I am used to working with people that do want to order what they want from the menu of life. I must try to surrender the desire to convince these lamb chop folks to order what they want. If choosing to not order what they really want helps them feel empowered, so be it. Right?
This may just be a matter of attitude and habits with money (same for calories). We all have them.
I enrolled in a weekend long class to figure out a little bit about my money hapitudes (habits and attitudes). Check out the website below if you are interested in more information. It could use a facelift, though the content is exceptional. The site and workshops are supportive in sorting out our relationship with $ and how that union affects our choices, and our wants.
http://www.moneyhabitudes.com
I learned so much. What type of $ person I am. I was nervous. I didn't know much about money or my relationship with it. Funny, the couples in the class were ying to yang with one another. I was my own ying/yang juxtaposition, since I chose to go it alone. The half of the twosomes that spent more than the budget had space for (usually secretly), felt guilty and entitled. They ordered the delicious Chops, always. The other half in each coupling was the direct opposite. They were usually the frugal rule makers, feeling safe when each penny is accounted for. They ordered the safe chicken. Each party admitted to singing up for the course after years of making themselves and their other half crazy with the habits and attitudes that collided within their union.
I came away less stressed and more grounded with the way I am about deserving and spending. I decided at the end of the course, that I wish for and plan for enjoying a Magical Amazing Love Affair with My Money. I want passion and purpose to drive my spending choices. That means, I will order what I want when it is aligned with my habitudes and budget. -- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. (http://start.westnet.ca/newstempch.php?article=terms.html/) It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
http://rc.feedsportal.com/r/238385864057/u/0/f/677045/c/35496/s/49df048a/sc/26/rc/1/rc.img (http://rc.feedsportal.com/r/238385864057/u/0/f/677045/c/35496/s/49df048a/sc/26/rc/1/rc.htm)
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