The 20 Funniest Tweets From Women This Week
 

The ladies of Twitter never fail to brighten our days with their brilliant -- but succinct -- wisdom. Each week, HuffPost Women rounds up hilarious 140-character musings. For this week's great tweets from women, scroll through the list below. Then visit our Funniest Tweets From Women page for our past collections.     

Listening to Donald Trump speak is very inspirational honestly. You miss 100% of the sentences you don't make
— Heben Nigatu (@heavenrants) March 4, 2016

adulthood is emailing "sorry for the delayed response!" back and forth until one of you dies
— Marissa Miller (@Marissa__Miller) February 26, 2016

my ideal presidential candidate is humble, open, and teachable so hahahahahahahah
— Nicole Chung (@nicole_soojung) February 28, 2016

when ppl win awards and say "to my friends, u know who you are" what if their friends are like "??? no motherfucker i don't, say my name!!!"
— Fariha Róisín (@fariharoisin) February 29, 2016

People of #SuperTuesday states! Don't forget to vote! Unless you're voting for a nutjob in which case, Super Tuesday is next Wednesday.
— Negin Farsad (@NeginFarsad) March 1, 2016

*buys vegan soup*
*puts cheese on it*
— Akilah Hughes (@AkilahObviously) March 2, 2016

I'd love to say I'm one of those people who start the day with sun salutations. In reality, it's with coffee and Prozac.
— Christina Anderson (@Xtina_Anderson) March 2, 2016

you ever been so tired you cant finish a sen
— Tracy Clayton (@brokeymcpoverty) March 4, 2016

My #LeapDay wish is to get zero more emails about how women are "allowed" to propose today
— Emma Gray (@emmaladyrose) February 29, 2016

"FOUR MORE YEARS! FOUR MORE YEARS!"-Leap Day
— Aparna Nancherla (@aparnapkin) February 29, 2016

You get an extra day* this year!

*Monday. You get an extra Monday this year.
— Melissa Dahl (@melissadahl) February 29, 2016

my ex just posted on facebook about how disgusting it is that they're making a new ghostbusters pic.twitter.com/h7InlIUhUy
— Dana Schwartz (@DanaSchwartzzz) March 3, 2016

America is like the latest episodes of Game Of Thrones in that nerds who read all the books have no idea what the fuck is going on anymore
— Erin Gloria Ryan (@morninggloria) March 2, 2016

This is it. This is the cup of coffee that will make me interesting.
— Elizabeth Hackett (@LizHackett) February 29, 2016

only goal i have left in life is to sing beyoncé's "i'm in my penthouse half naked" line & have it be true
— caitlin white (@harmonicait) February 29, 2016

It is Super Tuesday and Justin Bieber's birthday, so please present all your election commentary in the form of Bieber lyrics.
— Chloe Angyal (@ChloeAngyal) March 1, 2016

Life's too short to not eat the [insert dessert here].
— Carly Lane (@equivocarly) March 4, 2016

Oh The Passwords You'll Save!

a book by Dr. Seuss about my dating life
— Aude White (@audevwhite) March 2, 2016

Donald Trump has no political experience. Meanwhile you need 5 years experience for an entry level management position at Chili's
— Eliza Bayne (@ElizaBayne) March 2, 2016

It's clear that Donald Trump is the kind of lover who wouldn't honor a safe word.
— Jen Kirkman (@JenKirkman) March 3, 2016

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