Wait, what? LTE w/ Original SIM (i.e. V1)
 

Everything I've seen officially has stated you need a V3 Telus SIM in an LTE device to access the new network. It turns out this isn't entirely true - by setting the "Bearer" field in my N4's APN config to "LTE" and changing the well-documented preferred network type, it is now working on my old...

More...