I Am The Best: A Prose Poem By Donald J. Trump

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I am the most successful person ever to run for president. Nobody's ever been more successful than me. I have the best words. I am the most fabulous whiner. 

I am the best builder. Nobody builds walls better than me. I build the best product. Nobody can build a wall like Trump. I've always had people say, "Donald, you have the most beautiful hands." I have the steadiest hands. I have a very good brain.

Somebody made the statement that Donald Trump has built or owns the greatest collection of golf courses, ever, in the history of golf. And I believe that is 100 percent true. I have the best courses in the world.

I went to one of the best schools.

On trade, there's nobody more conservative than me. I'm the most conservative when it comes to military, when it comes to the border, when it comes to security, when it comes to illegal immigration: all of these things. I think I'm the most conservative person there is. I am the only one who can fix our southern border. There is nobody more against Obamacare than me. 

I could fix TV talk shows that are doing poorly. There is tremendous talent out there waiting to be tapped, and nobody sees it!

I am the worst thing that ever happened to ISIS. 

I will be the greatest jobs president God ever created. Nobody knows jobs like I do. I will create jobs like no one else.

Nobody has more respect for women than I do. 

No one has done more for people with disabilities than me.

I will help the veterans like no one else.

No one has done so much for equality as I have. 

I am the only one who can beat Hillary Clinton. I am Hillary Clinton's worst nightmare.

Nobody understands politicians like I do.

I am more presidential than anybody, other than the great Abe Lincoln.

Nobody is more pro-Israel than I am. Nobody but Donald Trump will save Israel. I have studied this issue in great detail -- I would say actually greater by far than anybody else. I am the most militaristic person on that stage. 

I have proven to be far more correct about terrorism than anybody. It's not even close.

My primary consultant is myself.

I am the least racist person you will ever meet. 

Nobody reads the Bible more than me.

I am very modest. I am the most humble celebrity. 

I'm treated very unfairly.

I am the only one who can make America truly great again.

I am the worst thing that ever happened to the establishment.

I am the best to win the general election. 


Editor's note: Donald Trump regularly incites political violence and is a serial liar, rampant xenophobe, racist, misogynist and birther who has repeatedly pledged to ban all Muslims -- 1.6 billion members of an entire religion -- from entering the U.S.
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